A transporter “accident” leaves Ensign Blue of the USS Yomato stranded on a mysterious alien planet, or Earth. Sometimes you never know. This may not even be “THE” Ensign Blue, but “A” Ensign Blue. Despite the Heisenberg compensators, pattern buffers and back-up safety routines, quantum duplicates can be created using a secondary confinement beam. Which can create some awkward situations! Especially if you feel like one of you is “unique, perhaps even special.” But these are the challenges we must face around the 23rd to 24th centuries. Living longer and prospering in the weirdest ways…
The second rule about phaser operation (as per Starfleet regulation 76, section 2, paragraph 2) is that they are “Not to be used for haircuts or any personal grooming.” During emergency situations, the phase pulse can be used to heat rocks for warmth, punch holes in claustrophobic caves, disintegrate an invasive alien species, or “zap”–hot coffee!
Religious observances are out of fashion on Earth, but sometimes it takes a little faith (of the heart) to survive on a hostile world. When the Sisko returns from the Celestial Temple, all temporal paradoxes will be solved. The aggressive, adversarial nature of linear time will finally be cured by the power of the Prophets (wormhole aliens). We may never make another mistake again. Sisko is coming! Infinite chances in infinite combination! Living longer and prospering further, forever! #ICIC #LLAPFF! “Yomato, Yomato.”
When something goes wrong, sometimes it’s hard not to assign blame, somewhere.
If piano lesson promises to the Prophets don’t work, there are always infinite possible futures to depend on. Coming alien civilizations may be curious about the Sisko, the Celestial Temple above Bajor and Starfleet deep space secrets from Section 31 and who was really responsible for the massacre at Wolf-359. They may not even know about the Federation was or what happens when you fly at Warp 10. The mysteries of the galaxy may all be revealed within the mind of a Blue man in a red shirt!
Even the most experienced, veteran Starfleet officer can crack under extreme pressures. Time is not constant. And a beard’s natural chronometer is not always reliable. Remember to be mindful of your surroundings! Check your beard regularly for lice and temporal distortions! Expect the unexpected when you least expect it! All you have to fear is having your mind trapped in a computer with “Fear” itself. What would Janeway do? #WWJD
Ensign Sky T. Blue
USS Yomato NCC-1305-A
Service Number: SE-99-BETA-1312
Transporter technician, Ensign third class
Siskotarian (Ultra Orthodox)